Thursday, February 26, 2009
Block test is finally over!!! Woohoo!
Anyways, today was totally my day, when I thought that it wasn't until this point in time. Hahaz! =)
Firstly, I went to the toilet and as I was leaving it, I made such a crazy bet to myself about something personal, that it would work out if I sit in the front row of the hall today. Then when i told myself that this would not happen, I went to the board and saw that I was supposed to sit at I1! I was like super shocked! Something tells me after that that things are gonna get well soon... =)
Anyways, the second thing is that Physics paper was not really that tough, and I actually have confidence to pass it! Hahaz. (Except for the part where I wrote R=IV... ARGH!)
For the rest of the subjects = SCREWED! Hahaz!
Anyways, after that paper I was supposed to go out for lunch with my classmates (actually a movie), but in the end they wanted to go to Sentosa and i couldn't go because of H3, and therefore, I was soooooo sad... (so sad that I had to message Jamie cos she replies my SMS fast, but after that become super lag... Hahaz. =) )
But...
It rained and therefore, no sentosa...
So they went to catch a movie while I realised how much of a slacker I am in H3, that when everyone has printed and done all their tutorials, I haven't even accessed the place where I get the tutorials and lecture notes even once! Let alone doing the tutorials. Hahaz!
So after the H3 I went to meet them and we while we waited for another friend to come, we dai-di-ed and mahjong and as usual, I am the one feeding people (lucky I never play money or I'll be broke!)
Then once our friend came, we went to eat. As usual, I did not eat cos I have dinner at home, but I was like starving by the time I was going home. But quite fun talking to my classmates as they'll listen much to me, unlike Louis who always complain that my stories are too long (impatient guy...)
Anyways, after that we went to walk walk in national geographic and too bad, we did not get to play in the air-con room. Hahaz. So we went for shopping (actually only window shopping) then we went to Toys-R-us to play! Super fun making a fool out of us JC students there. But ah wells, who cares?
So after that we went to sky park there and sat down...
and that was when this real funny thing happened!
Ming Fang was like using her slippers to hit Yong Le's and my shoes, cos I think she was bored or sumthing. So I grabbed one of her slippers then use my primary school trick (release the shoe before flinging my arm). Then when her slippers fell onto the ground through the trick, she thought that I really threw it into the sea. She was like sooooo shocked. (Her expression: Priceless... Hahaz!)
So anyways, I returned her slippers to her cos she looked so shocked... and her face was like so pale. I'm really sorry if I'd scared her...
Yups, and we had a singing session in sky-park, and apparently, I'm so gonna sign kejin up for the one, but i scared she'll go out of tune. Hahaz!
But one thing I dun like about the singing session is that there isn't much decent songs that I know how to sing! Everywhere oso liddat one...
Then it was home sweet home when the whole class took NEL (first time, so touched T.T) plus suaning time... hahahahahaz... I totally love suaning ming fang... Hahaz!
Yups, and here I am, typing this post with a full stomach and BUUUURRRRPPPPPPPP! Oops. Hehes...
For this next section, those who dun wan the spoil mood kinda feel should not read on. =)I was just thinking about it and I realised that I've been such a failure...It was block test this week and after my previous post of saying how much I blah blah blah broke my promises... I still couldn't do things well this week...I tried to help, but I found out that I could not even help myself at all...I started giving out wrong information (sorry RJ and Lilan) and even I was shocked...I simply was not prepared to teach at all...But there is one thing that made me real disappointed...is that I spend so much of my health, my time etc staying back to teach...but all I get is "Block test is screwed!"But one thing I was thinking is...Have you all ever tried or did your best?Have you all ever realised how important this is to some people (especially pynx who wanted all 26 of us to be in council camp)I'm real tired...block test is actually supposed to be a period where I get to sleep early...but I chose to stay back late...to help...to eat dinner as my supper...It's my bad...cos I am the one who made this choice...to stay back to help...and yet I am not capable of doing it...and something more disappointing about it is that all of you are people who can study!You all say that I am clever...but the truth is, I'm just the same as all of you!I am just an average person who fails his exam in his sec school...but only started to study...both hard and smart...and put my heart into it...listen to what teachers teach...and understanding it to teach others...All of you are even BETTER than me...But all these disappointments are disappointments in myself...not in all of you...cos I'm just disappointed in myself for not doing the right things...Right now what I can do is just retreat back into my cosy corner and think about things properly, and just put on a strong front in front of others...I need to get my life back to the correct orientation...I'm sorry that I won't be there for you all for a time being...But it'll be okay...For I'm just the unpreferred substitute...
(R^3)CMI wrote some crap again... <3 11:39 PM
Sunday, February 22, 2009
I feel like an arsehole...
I feel like a jerk...
What the hell is happening to me?!!!
I cannot even do what I've promised...
to my friends...
to myself...
to my family...
All these while I've told people like April, Jamie, CF, Ely etc (list is inexhautable) that I will help them out loads for block test, and that I shall be super well versed in what I am supposed to learn to be able to teach them...
But at this moment, I'm still freaking trying to study myself! I feel like a total failure...
All these while I told myself that I'll do things by certain dates, and continue with some of the things that I've wanted to do... But I just simply have no discipline! I'm like freaking wasting my life away doing nothing constructive...
My family...
I am super sorry to my siblings and parents...
I'm like such an idiot...
I just don't seem to appear much at home...
It just makes me feel so sad when my sis asks my mum why she doesn't see me at home...
It just makes me feel as if I've let my sis down when she's super happy that I can bring her home from school on Monday and thursday...
My brothers really wanna have a time to talk to me...
my parents too, want to have time to talk to me, but I'm like always reaching home late that they are going to bed already...
And now I think I can see that my parents are trying very hard to not force me to stay at home, though they really want me at home...
I dunno how else I can fufil any more promises to anyone...
I am a failure... till this point of time...
I love to stand in the rain, cos that is where nobody knows that I'm crying...
(R^3)CMI wrote some crap again... <3 12:03 AM
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Woohoo! I'm like totally refreshed!
I slept for like 13 hours already! And I totally dunno how I'm gonna sleep tonight! Hahaz!
Anyways, I really feel like blogging about orientation, and I am like kinda late cos it ended on thursday and it is already saturday...
Basically, I LOVED ORIENTATION!
Hahaz, though one week before orientation, everyone did not have the mood for orientation, with all that crying etc (refer to my previous post), orientation was a success!
I really wanna thank the OGLs, AVA, photog, House Exco and the JC1s for making this a success!
The OGLs are like perhaps the people that helped to bring the JC1s' moods up, and their cheering made us feel damn nice, damn shoik, until our spirits came back, and we made orientation real good!
The AVA really helped us alot this time, cos there wasn't like any proper dry runs, just last minute stuff (loads of thanks to clarence too!)
Photog really took many many nice nice pictures for us, and even stayed till late at night on the last day with us! Woohoo, you all rock!
I also really wanna thanks house-exco for their help in the telematch, for hyping the mood up, or else I would have been dead without them during the second half of telematch cos of the spoilt mikes... And it's really nice that we are working together! Woohoo!
Then finally, the JC1s! Yeah, you guys rock! You all made orientation a success. To tell you all the truth, when my friends from YJC told us that their 5 day orientation was super tiring and they were bored, I was scared that our 4 day orientation would be bad. But luckily, the 8.30am reporting time helped us alot! Yay! THe JC1s kept on cheering very loudly till the last minute, and I was almost deafened during the cheering competition at the very last part!
Hahaz, and I would also like to thank Randy for the wonderful decoration (Candhira, Ming Wei and CF too!) and the remix (April and Pynx too!)
I would also like to thank Louis, the favourite emcee of the JC1s! He totally rock man! He helped me a lot during the telematch and he could hype up everyone's mood! That was real nice! Thanks man!
And most importantly, the SWAT team (logist comm)! Without you all, orientation wouldn't be a success! I'm sooooo sorry about your hands and legs from all that running around with logist everyday, cos everything is like so last minute.
Anyways, though orientation was tiring, it was fun. All the time roaming around trying to get people to cheer, being emcee for telematch and with April on the third day really made me gain many new things. I'd always wanted to be an emcee for at least once, and that was one reason why I joined council. AND I GOT IT! Yay!
The roaming around really made me happy cos I could really hype people up, and make them cheer, and I did not know how I did that! Hahaz.
Finally, the finalle was BLOODY nice!
Everything went on super nice!
The remix music did not stop and therefore the songs were nice!
The lights were great!
and the hot and cold was super nice too! THe whole school was like doing it TOGETHER! (except for that spoil-sport Gloria who is like following EP to do some new actions...)
Hahaz, but it totally ended with a blast! And I feel proud, proud that I am part of the Orientation Ad hoc, as a PROgrammes head!
PROgrammes comm, you rock!
31st, all of you rock!
Aiya... basically, EVERYONE ROCKS!
Woohoo!
Orientation 2009, an orientation I'll never forget... =)
P.S. Happy valentines' day to everyone! =)
(R^3)CMI wrote some crap again... <3 8:35 PM
Wednesday, February 04, 2009
I cried today, and I'm like so proud of it!
Today is yet another day of orientation planning process that had overshot the deadline and I am like rushing the skit, and WHAM! came in the editting of the timeline by Mr Kwek for orientation to start at 8.30am.
Of course, this was what we had anticipated long long ago, but we thought everything would be okay, then we just kinda left it at one side. But suddenly, we had to come up with plans to solve it at the last minute.
Of course, this wasn't such a bad attempt, considering the fact that we did come to a compromise with many things properly, with the programme timeline created properly.
But one thing really spoilt my mood, and that is that we cannot stay in school. It totally spoils the mood I tell you. That was why I was like emo-ing before the photoshoot for 31st. But I kinda told myself that I shall be sad together with the rest when they hear the news, no point being sad first.
Hahaz, but anyways, the photoshoot kinda ended in the rain and then more photos and finally GM, which ended quite late such that we cannot practice for the skit, so I kinda cancelled the practice for today...
Anyways, it was really sad after that when I did not have the mood to dance and just simply left the classroom to breathe some fresh air. But that was when Jamie and April saw me and asked me to follow them to talk.
Then I kinda felt so sad when I saw so many ppl crying. I also cried too, but at that point of time, it was only to a small extent. I just feel so damn stressed of it, that the skit needs to be completed by friday.
Anyways, just as the rest were like asking where we were gone to, I told myself that I have to save the mood instead of spoiling it, so I went back to dance and became hyperactive out of a sudden.
After that, we left the place again, and I saw so many others crying, and I sorta joined them. And that was when after much persuasion, I've decided to cancel the whole council skit.
I shared my many experiences with them, and we really had lots of talks and talks and crying and crying, and I found out that everyone has lost the mood for orientation, that they have gone over the limit and had no choice but break down.
After that, when they are sooooo hungry that they had to move off first, I stood up and told Chun Fui that orientation will be the best. And just as I told him that, it triggered something. Tears started GUSHING out non stop from my eyes.
I really have to thanks CF on this. He followed me to walk the whole of the drum block's fifth floor for 2 rounds and hearing me talk about how good orientation should be. And this is a summarised version of what I've told him.
We had 4 ad hocs already...
Investiture - I could sit on the banner...
Teacher's day - I learnt to do sai kang and feel so satisfied...
Post-LTC - I totally enjoyed it alot and that was the first time I put gel on my hair...
JIPA - I love GLORIA 4!
These are all the wonderful memories that I've had. And i just want the same for orientation. I want orientation to be the best, and council camp to create the best council ever, i.e. 32nd.
Then I talked about some things of council camp with him, telling him of what I've told Jamie on the one thing i am really scared of...
And one thing that happened so wierd is that this time it was April who is asking me if I am okay, asking me to relax and seeing me cry...
That was like totally opposite this time, I used to be the one who is always asking her to chill, to ask her not to cry, to tell her to smile, but just for this time, it was her who did it for me... Thanks April. =)
Yups, and we had dinner at MACs and I really thank Stevenn alot for his burger! I'll return him one one day! Yay!
And here I am, at home, typing this post, and this was what i typed to the cast of council skit, PROgrammes and CPR...
'Orientation is OUR event, and it is for the JC1s. To give them a memory so good, that in 10 years down the road, when people ask them what they enjoyed the most in NYJC, they say it is Orientation, just like the same way many of us loved orientation.'
I'll bring back the mood of orientation, I'll do it... Orientation is gonna be the best, no more, no less, no excuses... =)
I cried today, and i'm still so proud about it...
(R^3)CMI wrote some crap again... <3 11:12 PM
